Life is short...sometimes too short!

Most of us do not want to think of our own imortality but from time to time things come up and we find the very subject monopolizing our conscious thoughts.

We write wills. We talk about how we want our crap distributed. We plan elaborate ceremonies so people can come pay homage to the person that no longer is. We throw a granite marker to remind people if our existence.

What if we left our marker by loving like there is no tomorrow? What if we loved without fear of rejection? What if we lived life trying to love those society wrote off? We are afraid to love. When we love we become vunerable. When we become vunerable we may get hurt. It is at that point we really love. The very moment we experience pain is the moment we learn to love.

Love can do some amazing things. It will cause a man to give the shirt off his back. A woman will endure hours of pain in order to bring a new life into this world. Love causes us to do crazy things too.

The most amazing thing love has done was held a man to a tree. At anytime this man could have come down. But, because of the tremendous love he had he endured. He loved like there was no tomorrow.

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Friday morning dump!

I have not been on here near as much as I would like to. I have several posts sitting in drafts waiting to be finalized, but whether they ever make it is another story. I am really wanting to become more disciplined and a better steward of my time. I have all these ideas I want to make a reality, but can't seem to find the time to push forward on them.

I am thankful for the people I get to walk through life with. I get to hang out with the most inspirational teenagers I have ever met. They are truly amazing. From organizing a school-wide (public school) mission project to looking at the hard verses in scripture and asking what is God really saying in this verse? They challenge me as we walk together in this crazy thing we call life. As a student pastor I wish our gathering realized the role they could be playing in shaping our church body in the future. It is frustrating at times to see them and me written off as "the youth". There is so much talent amongst them. We have authors, interior decorators, singers, musicians, servants, teachers, encouragers, artist, photographers, you name it and it is probably represented within our group. But they are the "youth" group. I have been able to watch this group grow in their walk consistently. They have wisdom that only comes from walking in relationship with their Lord. I pray that no matter what lies ahead in their future that they will spur each other on to grow and chase after their relationship with Jesus. That they run after it with reckless abandonment. That they do not grow weary.

I am weary. I continue to pour out and constantly try to empty myself into the students and my family. I love that part. It is refreshing to know I have given all. I am weary from being drained. My job drains me daily. I try to do a job that honors Christ, but at times feel like I get taken advantage of. I am reminded of how Christ was taken advantage of and push forward. I try to serve two masters. Money and God. I have to work to pay the bills, but that takes away from the task that has been laid in front of me. I push forward sacrificing what I can. I am drained from constantly being on guard. I know that is Satan trying to disrupt what I am here to accomplish, but it wears on you. I try to be all things to all men/women, but realize that some people don't want that. I push forward. I am broken and beaten, but I push forward longing for the day when I can look back on this and see the Master plan.

I search for clarity and direction. I am humbled that God has called me for these tasks and even ask "Why me?" at times. I push forward still. How much easier would it be to run, but then I realize there is no place to run. God has put me here for His purpose so I continue to cling on and push forward.