Cancer Awareness!

As we go through life we face difficult times and pray for change. We sometimes view life as diseased or sick. For the sake of this blog I am going to refer to these hard times as cancer for many times we have no cure for them. We are willing to try anything but many times it feels we are only prolonging the outcome as we become sicker and sicker. This cancer can come in many forms just as the real thing. It can be a minor form of skin cancer or a full blown inoperable tumor. It can be an annoying inconvenience or rob you of the joy and fullness of life.

There is hope however. We spend way to much energy trying to find the cure instead of turning to the Great Physician. I have had times (and will in the future)where this disease has crept into my life and felt overwhelmed. In the very recent past I have seen if we are patient and wise there is a cure. I have seen God cure the disease if we turn it over to him. We may have been quick to perform surgery to rid ourselves of the disease but God's plan was to take a more patient and noble approach and allow us to learn to depend on Him during our sickness. How rewarding that can be.

When our health is restored we feel the need to fall on our knees and rejoice! How great are your ways O Lord! Our patient is rewarded by removing this disease from us and restoring our health. The disease has ran its course and we are free!

Easter revisited!

Well now that Easter is a day behind us it is time to step back and look at what went on in my ever evolving mind. Church was good. My wife and I decided at the last minute to relieve the nursery workers so they could attend services. Wow what a bunch of work that is. Do not ever take those people for granted. I was ready for a midday nap way before midday. It was great though to see all those children there. We had 3 times as many children as normal. What a blessing.

We hear the Easter story every year and almost become numb to it. We see the movie and the dramas, hear the Sunday school lesson and sermons but never really sit and reflect on it. Of course He died for you and I. We somehow find ourselves almost worthy or expecting it. After all in our self righteuosness we deserve it, don't we?
We look around and know there are others who deserve it much less than we do. This year I really tried to paint a different picture of Christ laying His life down for us. I tried to show His love for those we tend to hate so much. I thought about those beating Him to a bloody pulp before the cross and imagined Him hanging on the cross and wanting them to really understand. My nature is to seek revenge . We throw around phrases like I would take a bullet for my family or friends or I wish I could take their place. Let me ask you this, would you take a bullet for the person you hate the most? Would you take a bullet for the very person thatt threatens your existence? Then ask yourself if you would do this knowing that they would still reject you after laying your life down for them? As I try to imitate Christ more closely I struggle with the same things over and over again.

I can not fathom a love like this. I am learning to love but have so much more to learn. I try to see people as He sees me but still struggle with this. Sure I love but do I truly love everyone or do I pick and choose the ones that don't threaten my comfort zone?

Birthday Boy!

What a day! Connor's birthday was today and we got him good. We had a surprise party for him at the bowling alley where some of his best friends were waiting on him They had a blast bowling and dancing. Someone gave Connor the crazy idea of bowling between his legs. He was actually really good at it. The boy got hooked up.

We then went to spend part of his loot where he finally was able to buy a hobby box. He had his usual run of good luck once again. Instead of getting the two autographs you are suppose to get he got three. His favorite was a Dominique Wilkins autograph with Acie Law IV and Josh Smith from the Hawks.

He thenwent to his favorite restaurant Lampu's Japanese Steakhouse. I can see him trying this when he is allowed to cook. He did get a little embarassed when they came along and sang to him but I think it was worth the free ice cream.

Life is Good! God is so good!

I walk thru life thinking I have finally figured it out and then God smacks me in the face only to realize how little I have figured out. This is a good thing though. It is these slaps in the face that mature me, challenge me, and encourage me. I thank God for these moments. They push me to be more disciplined and to strive to have my heartbeat as one with my Lord. I sometimes wonder how many times I have ignored the guiding hand of the Father and how much further along I could be.

I know content is a dangerous place to be, but I am content. I am not content with my walk, but with my life. I am in a church who may not understand my way of thinking (sometimes I don't understand it), but the body has come around me and lifted me up and encouraged me tremendously. It is so nice they accept my leadership and understand I am being guided by the Holy Spirit - not a man. In return I want to encourage them to take their faith out of the four walls of the church.

I am encouraged by a professor that has started a new church. I see him renewed and alive. I pray the Lord blesses his efforts and brings people around him to lift him up and stand in the gap for him. Part of me longs to be there with him as he transforms the community and gives proper meaning to "church". However, for now I will wait.

My family sacrafices for me to work two jobs and go to school. They seem to enjoy the complicated lifestyle this has caused. Life and God are amazing!

Living the Life!

Today was our (FOCUS Lockhart's College & Career and friends) second time to go visit the homeless of downtown. We had a great time. I think we are all a little nervous and/or anxious on the way. We are never quite sure how we will be greeted. We have all heard horror stories on how they are a bunch of drunks, greedy and out to rip you off, but we have yet to see that. We actually see quite the opposite. They are so kind and gracious. Everyone of them thanks us and just smiles. Instead of feeling like they are asking for more I leave there feeling like I should have done more. We were dissapointed in the small number of people we ran across today. I believe the heat and the antique car show pushed them into the air-conditioning of the library.

We always run into someone who has a story that sticks with us. This time it was a lady who I would guess to be in her mid-to-late forties. She told us how she came here to get a new start and had everything stolen from her. The part of her story I want to relate to us is she started telling us about how she got a sunburn on her forehead in the shape of a heart. She told us how God gave her this sunburn. We are quick to write her off as whatever! The sun must be getting to her. She told us this sunburn was because God was going to take care of her. We told her He would always take care of her and was looking out for her. The part I want you to pay attention to is that she brought up God, not us. My belief is she saw something different in us as we were giving away lunches and she was trying to find something in common with us. Our random act of kindness was a transparent view of what is in our hearts. When asked if we think we can make a difference my response will be "Don't ask us ask those to whom we have made a difference." Whether that be a homeless lady or within our own lives.

What a day!

Today was one of those days. It seems that whenever everything begins to flow together turmoil is right around the corner. I was so pumped after last Wednesday night and everything at church was clicking then here comes this week. I couldn't FOCUS (how ironic since we are FOCUS) on my lesson. My mind was going over all the jargon I had been memorizing for my test. Sorry guys but I fall short too.

Then there is school. I fell like I did well on my test but for what?!? Big Deal I got an A. That used to be important to me, but now I feel like I am going through the motions to get a piece of paper. I want more than that. I want to be transformed by what I am learning, but I find the desire suppressed!

Then I get the news that my boss has screwed me over yet again. I bust my butt for her and she continues to allow people to suck her dry in return she screws me over. How I long to be in "full time" ministry. Yes I know it has its crappy days but at the end of the day I know I will finally feel satisfied. I long to be able to devote more time to my ministry. It could be so much more if I could only fully devote myself to it.

Restless!

I have a big test tomorrow and can't seem to relax and go to bed. I feel unprepared but have put alot into studying. I stress about my grades and feel sometimes I am missing the point and just going through the motions so I can get the grade. I really wish we could be graded on how we are implementing these classes into our lives instead of how well we can memorize some stupid definition that we will never have to spit out again.